Thoughts on just being a guy

[sebbie]

Part LXLVI

Sexual relationships are frequently not all they are cracked up to be. Being alone is frequently not all that it is cracked up to be, but for different reasons. In both instances, there are all sorts of different things that can and do happen.

For starters, every guy is “wired” a little differently in this regard. Some guys’ entire lives seem to be built around being in a sexual relationship with another person, and these guys cannot imagine living their adult life any other way (not me). Other guys like living alone and are without the psychological burdens of being in a sexual relationship with another person. They see being in a relationship as something they do not tolerate, let alone enjoy. Still other guys seem to move back and forth over and over, living for a time in a relationship, then alone, then back in. (This approach can get really expensive dollar-wise in a hurry, especially for the guys going through several marriages and then divorces, not to mention the possible trail of kids along the way).

Every guy is wired differently in this respect and each guy makes a series of choices along the way, choices sometimes made while enjoying a hard penis but sometimes and even often not. This is the interesting part about being a guy—the navigation end of it. What do I do now? How much of this can I tolerate? Etc. etc. Life is filled with options and choices and a lot of these choices are difficult to make.

Me? I’ve always been in love with living alone. I watch these other guys deal with all of this in their own individual ways and a lot of it seems to make them uneasy—even scared—not happy. I keep comparing it all with the life I enjoy and keep coming to the conclusion that for me, at least, there is no comparison. I love my life just the way it is.

Still, as a single guy not in a relationship there COULD be something missing. Something some of the guys seem to think is very important to their personal well being. What could that be? Well, you already know the answer to that question, or at least I think you do. I had some fun times growing up, and at my age I finally feel at least somewhat comfortable writing about them. Guys fall out of sexual relationships every day. Not only great divorce battles, but the illness or death of a spouse, or a spouse may decide that she is not up to having sex any more. That can happen too. What is a guy to do then? Crawl in a corner and sulk? Does the end of a sexual relationship mean that the guy will never have another orgasm, or that orgasms will return only if another partner is found? I should hope not.


Let me give you four prepositions to think about when navigating through life as a guy. The four Prepositions are WITH, BY, FOR, and TO. Think about pairing each of these four prepositions with the words “YOUR PARTNER”. Now this is starting to make a little sense because suddenly and obviously I am talking, about a partner-based sexual relationship.

Most obviously this is going to be happening WITH YOUR PARTNER. But your partner is going to be an active participant in the goings on so what you are doing is in part BY YOUR PARTNER, but also FOR YOUR PARTNER, because you would at least like to assume that your partner will RECEIVE some gratification from who you are and what you are doing. That goes right along with TO YOUR PARTNER in that you expect that as a result of your efforts your partner will be in a better place from a psychological and sexual perspective. Both partners both get to benefit and both get and receive gratification from the act.

Now let me toss out the possibility that WITH YOUR PARTNER” could be replaced with the word “YOURSELF.” That simple chance creates all new meanings for each preposition. Indeed, the phases now all suddenly become “code words” for masturbation.

Look at the phrase “WITH YOURSELF” If ever there was a code phrase for masturbation that one is it. I am the one who is going to be in charge, and I enjoy playing WITH MYSELF.

To me, at least, the phrase “BY MYSELF” is a bit less overtly sexual because many guys like to do things by themselves that are not focused on stroking the penis, but BY MYSELF could still be a code word for masturbation as an activity mixed in with other non-overtly sexual activities.

The phrase “FOR MYSELF” is really interesting, because it implies that what I am doing to myself I find to be thoroughly enjoyable and I am doing it because I feel better when I do it and because I do it. I like it! I like it! A lot of guys seem to think that it is somehow “unmanly” if they admit even to themselves that they think masturbating is really pleasant and enjoyable and often get hung up comparing an orgasm from masturbation to their best orgasm-inducing episodes involving partner sex. In the comparison a masturbation-induced orgasm may or may not come up short relative to what happened in partner sex, but few guys would care to admit to anything other than that the partner sex was superior.

And finally, the phrase “TO YOURSELF” implies that a guy will be doing “stuff to his own body, and exploring places that he might not have always known existed. This is where the accumulated knowledge not only from the teen years but from a lifetime of exploring, touching and prodding. This accumulated knowledge is what makes being a guy so enjoyable, and the storehouse every guy accumulates in this respect should never be downplayed, alone or in a relationship.

To be continued…

[sebbie]

Part LXLVII

Generally I am not a fan of porn videos and watching them is not something I regularly do, though on occasion my curiosity gets the best of me. I suspect that this on occasion happens to other guys as well. In this particular situation, I found myself being interested in the use of what are called VED devices (penis pumps) and estim devices as treatments for Erectile Dysfunction (ED) as in not being able to get it up on your own. I was only vaguely aware that VED devices had both a serious medical use but also were being used by guys without ED for purely “recreational purposes” as in a toy connected to masturbation.

In the process, I learned some interesting details about the video sites. The sites seem be divided into two major sections, gay and straight. If I want videos relating to techniques for employing penis pumps, I am ushered into the gay section of the site. (The estim devices are a bit more complicated in part because females have been known to employ estim too but let me not get into that line of thought right now.}

At one time the term “gay sex” for males was a codeword for two guys engaging in oral or anal sex, and if a viewer was looking at gay videos that would be a key feature. I have often thought that starting with HIV, what gay sex is has changed a lot from this old view. For starters, gay guys increasingly found other ways for being together than engaging in the interchange of bodily fluids. In the process of dealing with the HIV threat the very meaning what gay men do to and with each other has changed pretty drastically over time, at least for many.

But the other thing that I found interesting was that if I were to go to the straight section of the video site, I would expect that nearly all of the videos would include two people, a male and a female, exchanging bodily fluids in one way or another.

However, on the gay video side, there were videos showing gay sex in various forms involving two men. But many, perhaps most, of the videos labeled as gay sex were really videos of guys masturbating themselves alone in a room, cameras rolling.

By the time ANY guy has turned 12, his body is doing all sorts of interesting and fun things to and with him. These things most frequently happen when a guy is alone. But practically any guy likely is HUGELY interested in the basic question of whether or nit his male “buds” are having the same “issues” and how they are dealing with it. But finding out is not easy.

If the guy asks outright, he quickly aware of the possibility that some guys will immediately conclude he is gay merely by asking the question. But to be interested in how your own body works and whether or not other guys are having the same experiences, does not somehow imply that I am gay.

As guys get older a lot of these questions drag on unanswered. Getting a roommate in a college dorm, for example. MOST guys are not going to attempt to go through a 4-year degree avoiding masturbation entirely for the entire four years. That would be downright painful. (Can you say “blue balls”?) The question is not “Will I masturbate in college?” but rather when, where and will jerk off in order to maintain my “image” as a serious student focused on my degree (and not on chasing women). I’ve observed that the masturbators generally do better in college grade-wise than the women chasers do and that the most serious students tend to also be the ones most into engaging in solo sex.

The other complicated problem is that MOST guys, perhaps nearly all of them, at some level find being able to actually observe another guy jerking off, psychologically is at least interesting to see even if they do not openly admit to quietly observing another guy jerking off as being sexually exciting. This is NOT a gay or straight thing, where the straight guys see this as being repulsive versus the gay guys being turned on and “enjoying” what they are getting to observe, perhaps, by accident.

So I start looking at videos that contain penis pumps, and the vast majority of them each show just one guy wearing a VED device and pumping himself up. Typically these are young guys who have zero ED issues and this is merely a form of recreational masturbation. A few of these videos contain several guys wearing pumps and using the devices together in the same room. This is like a VED-inspired “circle jerk” and maybe they pump each other’s VED. Is that somehow a gay act? Who knows!

But more generally, it appears to me that nearly all of the videos showing one guy jerking off are in the gay section not the straight section of the video site VED device employed or not. If I want to find videos of guys ejaculating while wearing a swim brief these will be found here as well. (So you mean other guys besides me have been known to do that too? How interesting!)

Then there are the so called “wrestling” videos in which two guys, sometimes both clad in swim briefs, wrestle each other. These typically involve some initial moves in which both guys avoid touching each others; private parts, but then as the match progresses they almost invariably end up masturbating each other usually with their briefs still on, but sometimes not.

All of this leaves in my mind some really interesting questions with respect to what it really means when a guy claims to be either gay or straight. Maybe, just maybe, guys make an attempt to subdivide themselves in this way because they think that by so doing is the only way to survive into adulthood. But ultimately, what you claim you are is as how you yourself want it to be. Medical questionnaires to be filled out in doctor’s office seriously ask the question “ you gay or straight? And expect a one-or-the-other response. The response “I have no clue” is not an option.

Surely, every guy who enjoys masturbating alone is not gay—nor straight for that matter, Not every guy who gets aroused when he wears a swim brief is gay either. Me, I’m curious if other guys enjoy wearing swim briefs as much as I do and finding out exactly how prevalent my “affliction” might be. And being curious about how other guys cope with their own masculinity is not a valid means to determine your sexual orientation. What does it tell you about a guy’s sexual orientation if a guy likes to see how other guys masturbate and the techniques they employ? Does that somehow make me gay, or am I just “filling in the blanks” with respect to some of the questions I never got good answers to way back when I was a teenager. Are there other guys out there who get a hard-on whenever they pull themselves into a snug Speedo® . Well maybe!

Lots to ponder here. Throwing all the solo masturbation videos in the pile with the gay partner videos was an interesting move on the part of the web sites. Life is sweet but sometimes things happen in unexpected ways. Particularly in what guys enjoy doing to, with, by, and for themselves.

To be continued…

[sebbie]

Part LXLVIII

Growing up and as a teenager, I never got to participate in any team or individual sports. The high school lacked a swimming pool and the sports that the school did participate in (mostly Football and basketball) were not my thing at all. Still, as a young teen I guess I was always fascinated by the fact that a lot of sports seemed to require that the guy participating in it wear a specific item that fit, well, rather snug in the groin area.

The teen kids did get in the water but this was usually in a lake or river not in a pool. Some towns had city pools, and back then—this would have been in the late 50s to the mid 60s—it was much more common for guys to wear swim briefs for recreational swimming. Maybe half the guys wore brief-style suits and the other half wore boxer style trunks normally with a brief nylon lining for “support”. Of course for the trunks the lining idea was there to help ensure that a guy’s private parts did not accidentally appear while the guy was swimming in the loose-fitting shorts—which incidentally had legs maybe 6-8 inches long, nothing like the current baggy swimwear that fits down to the knees.

But the briefs were different too, particularly in that they were high-rise as in fitting high enough to the waist that a guy’s belly button was covered. These had “panel” supporters that were simply a piece of nylon in the front of the brief, and elastic leg openings that did a good job of not letting a guy’s private parts fall out unexpectedly.

I was fascinated by the brief style suits my cousins were wearing and I wanted to wear one too, but mom somehow opposed the idea. Dare I say that just thinking about being able to get myself into one was a turn-on that I enjoyed even if I did not fully understand why I felt this way. And the fact that my mom opposed this made the whole idea even more interesting and exciting to me.

There was other stuff too. This was the era of the old-school jock-strap or athletic supporter. Team sports normally required those…basketball, football and baseball. The baseball option had another component that interested me, the hard cup. I presumed that my buds were not going to be able to wear a strap without having some “impact” on them, and I also quickly concluded that something that tight and skimpy must be fun to be in. (I only got my first strap as a young adult, but I quickly made up for lost time in this respect.)

And the cups! Ahh the cups. Isn’t it interesting how a guy’s penis sends the guy happy signals inside a cup even if the cup doesn’t fit that snug. It’s as if a penis can sense something confining it even though the touch is light if at all. My penis knows when it is in a happy place and lets me know in no uncertain ways. Of course I was curious how guys could be strapped in and in a confining cup and still keep their attention directed at the game they are playing. I still wonder about that except to say that few sports require guys to wear old-school cups and straps any more, and if a guy needs to be cupped for protection, generally he will wear a pair of compression shorts with a pocket for a cup. And the really neat snug-fitting cups are getting hard to find.

My first exposure to a wrestling singlet was via my cousin, a year younger than me, who was a high school wrestler. He lived several states away but I saw pictures of him in his singlet, and of course I thought that was neat too.

This was another period in which men’s jeans fit really snug, much like today. Light tan, (wheat-colored) jeans that fit way snug in the butt, groin, through the thigh, and in the leg opening were all the rage with the guys. Stretch denim had yet to be invented, but the fit was really tight anyway. Guys seemed to vie to see who could wear the snuggest light tan denim jeans.

In this case I talked my mom into letting me buy a pair. My mom wanted me to try them on before I bought them and I was very fortunate not to have had an “ejaculatory incident” in the changing room. Somehow, I managed but I was really scared stiff.

Still I did have an unfortunate ejaculatory incident” when I put these on and started moving around wearing them in a public area. This event still haunts me and I am still uncomfortable relating the details of what exactly happened. I will say that the semen left a nice round wet spot on the front of my then-new jeans. But I learned an important lesion that day about the importance of keeping my urges under control. Still, to this day the right pair of snug-fitting jeans does stuff to me that is both interesting and fun. In this respect the jeans fit right in with the other snug-fitting gear I have accumulated over the years.

The gear has played an important role for me as an adult even after having my prostate surgically remove, up until this very day.

I have been working on various strategies aimed at improving the involuntary blood flow in and out of my penis during the night as a post-surgery rehab exercise and with some success. A key to doing this is to put my penis under tension all night long. What better way to do this than with a swim brief?

So last night I pulled out a little red ClubSwim Euro brief with a black front liner. Now the trick is to point my penis upward so the underside is pressing firmly against the liner in the front. That feels good. I can touch or tap the underside of my penis for a really neat sensation that I like a lot—just the rehab experience I need to have. After all, this is serious stuff and what I am doing with myself is all for science. The ClubSwim briefs are nearly as low rise as the Japanese style ones and I need to keep tugging at them so as to not show a “Y”.

Yesterday evening I found an old pair of looser-fitting but short-legged old-school Puma shorts in shiny blue fabric, much like the kids I went to school with wore in the 60s. Then I started playing with myself from the OUTSIDE of the shorts. THREE layers of fabric, but moving the puma layer across the underside of my contained penis felt really really good, in that I am getting decent blood flow into my penis with every pass of my fingers across the cloth. And when I looked this morning there was a tell tale spot of dried precum clearly visible on the black swim brief liner.

I need to try this one again, but that is exactly where I need to be in my rehab efforts!

To be continued…

[sebbie]

Part LXLVIV

As my readers no doubt already know, I became fascinated with how snug-fitting clothing of all different kinds at an early age and this has affected me both psychologically and physically. This started well before I was even completely aware how male and female body parts came together, but I already knew that my penis loved getting “stuck” in a snug-fitting place. I also knew that somehow I wanted to try coming up with ways that would make me feel really good in this respect.

I had no clue as to whether other guys my age were dealing with a similar “affliction” or not. Some of my buds seemed more inclined to get into fairly intricate conversations relating to some of girls in my class, and what they were talking about seemed far away from what seemed to be happening to me.

Of course, getting to pull on a Speedo® swim brief was at the very top of the things I wanted to do. But the chance of me getting to do that any time soon was impossible given that I had no remotely plausible reason to claim that I needed one of those suits. This seemed even more distant than the discussions some of my buds were having regarding girls.

Still, I couldn’t ignore the fact that I was getting increasingly attached to my penis and the sensations that it seemed to be able to create at a moment’s notice. It seemed to like for me to just THINK about how much it would like to be snug inside a Speedo®. [I sometimes wonder what percentage of Speedos® are sold for swimming versus other forms of “recreation.”] Were other guys in part buying Speedos® because they liked how they felt on the body, and not just as attire for water sports such as swimming and diving?

In looking at clothing items, the question always on my mind is “will me penis like being in that?” and over the years I have discovered that my affliction applies to other assorted items as well, usually but not always ones containing a significant percentage of Spandex. (Denim-look spandex-lased men’s jeans can be purchased nowadays that fit so snug to the body that they feel like wearing a pair of slick running tights.)

Then there are the “problems” associated with being horny in a snug-fitting clothing item. I realize that a lot of guys have what I call a Speedo® fear. There are three components to a Speedo® fear. 1. What if I get an erection just getting into my suit and there is no way to hide that I am suddenly massive down there? This could be quite embarrassing. 2. Whenever I get horny even if I am not erect I tend to drip precum. This is going to create interesting but potentially embarrassing little spots on my suit that the other guys might notice and tease me about. 3. What if a worst case scenario occurs and I get so hard just getting into the brief that I almost immediately start to ejaculate in powerful bursts all over the front of my suit. Or, still worse, what happens is I am able to keep from doing that while I am still in the locker room and then I walk to the pool and suddenly start into a powerful and uncontrollable ejaculation out there in front of everyone. This ejaculatory fear is holy terror for sure.

I remain convinced that these three components of Speedo® fear deter a lot of guys from wearing them despite that deep down they “like very much” the signals they are getting from their penises with respect to what might happen if they did wear one. Using a brief as a masturbation assistant in private is very different from subjecting yourself to the potential for having to deal with the consequences of these kinds of semi-public and public situations.

The precum issue itself is interesting. I suspect few guys who are not used to regularly wearing Speedos® will NOT ooze at least a few drops of precum once inside the suit. Assuming you crawled into the brief with your penis pointed firmly downward, these drops may appear as tiny wet spots on the outside of the brief, but they will conveniently hidden from view as they will be located between the guy’s legs.

But, what if the guy positions himself with his penis pointed to one side or even in the “classic” or so-called “Christopher Atkins position” pointed straight up toward the waistband with the sensitive underside pressing firmly against the lining of the brief pouch. (This is an extraordinarily fun place to be both physically and psychologically and I enjoy myself regularly in that situation). The public will likely be able to make out the outline of a distinct cylinder inside your brief. he T of that cylinder will terminate with a tiny damp spot of ooze, darker than the rest of the brief, and maybe the size of a dime or even a nickel. Fascinating! The suit is clearly “doing stuff” to the guy, psychologically and physically. Once a swimmer dives into the pool and the suit is suddenly all wet. All of this precum spotting will be gone in an instant. I wonder how many guys can actually say that on occasion they have had a full orgasm in the pool while wearing a Speedo®.

Finally, let me shift gears entirely and let me tell you about the predicament faced by the young man who has just purchased a new pair of snug-and slick blue jeans—the ones made of spandex-laced denim that have narrow leg openings, fit snug to the thigh and groin and stretch to fit around the waist, making the space for one’s private parts very limited, and even more limited should things firm up at all. Then the guy is early in the dating experience, but decides it would be fun to go on a date with a girl he likes, and of course, he thinks he looks really sexy in the new jeans and hopes his date will think so too.

Now MOST guys like to try and maintain at least a bit of decorum. This requires acting as if you might be aroused to a degree by the girl, but certainly a long ways from being to the stage of having intercourse. Still, the light petting the two of them are doing is having impacts on the guy both psychologically and physically, and those jeans leave little room to comfortably grow. They are bearing down on the guy’s penis even as the girl is having her psychological impacts. Suddenly the guy is no longer able to contain his condition, and begins a series of repetitive and now unstoppable ejaculatory bursts, strands of semen come right out the front of the jeans. How embarrassing!

Or maybe not. I hear that some girls “like” to see this happen to horny guys on dates, and they hone their techniques for getting them there while they still have their pants on. The girl herself thinks its erotic to see a guy create an ejaculatory mess like this while still fully clothed in a new pair of slick-fitting jeans. Further, if the guy gets off this way there is no concern for the other issues related to “what if we end up having real intercourse?” Is what happened real sex or not? Maybe the current popularity of really snug-fitting male jeans has to do with the guy secretly “hoping” he will get in this predicament.

As a young teen, I did not even have to go out on a date. I pulled on my new undyed denim wheat colored jeans with the intention of wearing them after meeting a friend for a walk. Just doing that must have made me pretty hard. I recall my tumescent penis lying flat held against one of the narrow legs of the jean. As I walked along, my penis moved back and forth with each step. That made me even more aroused, and after a few steps I couldn’t keep from ejaculating any longer. I suddenly had to stop walking because I was in the throes of a powerful orgasm, and within seconds there was a big ejaculatory wet spot on the right thigh of my jeans.

The guy I was with saw all of this. He said not a word. I quickly made an excuse to head back (and change my jeans). Come to think of it, I still like wearing jeans, and the snugger the fit the better!

To be continued…

[sebbie]

Part C (100th chapter)

Every evening, before bedtime, I go through a nightly selection process to determine what I am going to wear throughout the night. As my readers already know, one of my swim briefs is usually high on my list as a choice, and since I own lots of them, I have many to choose from.

Take last night, for example. There is an excellent off-price clothing retailer in town that stocks stuff that for whatever reason did not sell in the allotted length of time at a full-price retailer. I see items there that once hung in a Macys all the way to, believe it or not, sometimes items that once were at Walmart that did not sell, and every store in between.

I never quite understood why this occurred. Adidas used to market swim briefs in the US, but apparently decided about 10 years ago that there just was not enough demand to keep doing that here anymore. The briefs were still being made and were still being sold in places like Europe and maybe in parts of Asia. It was the US sales that suddenly stopped.

For me, at least, in terms of fame, the Adidas swim brief, but especially the black one with the three white slashes in both sides, is one of only a few all-time classic swim brief designs. It’s right up there with the Sapphire blue Speedo® Christopher Atkins wore in the Dallas episodes. Whatever you think about whether or not guys should wear swim briefs, these two briefs, the black Adidas® and the blue Speedo® really “define” the genre. These are not the skimpiest briefs out there by any means, not by a long shot, but they create a special look that other swimwear makers have never quite captured. Any fan of swim briefs should have these two in his collection. I also keep a sapphire blue Speedo I have in its original cardboard box as it was sold in the specialty stores that catered to young athletes that were part of swim teams.

Anyhow, Adidas stopped selling the briefs, and they ended up on a rack at my off-price retailer. I showed up, by accident, shortly after they arrived. I was like a kid in a candy store. They were only in black, but that is the must-have color anyway. And the price? $4.99 each! Like I say I was like a kid in a candy store. I must have bought 8, maybe ten of them in various waist sizes from 28 to 34. I even gave one away to a friend who liked wearing swim briefs.

I still have the rest of them. Some of them still have tags on them and are marked $4.99. I keep some in original condition with tags and wear others.

What is it about these briefs that make them so interesting. Why is it that I get horny just thinking about just being in one? And why did Adidas end up stopping the sale in the US. Am I picking up on something other guys somehow don’t know about?

So, I put one of them on—one of the smaller ones with either a 28- or 30-inch waist. Hey, not only do these feel great but I look good as well but especially for a guy in his 60s. Just doing this makes me feel, well, you know. (see photo attachment)

Truth is a few years back Adidas started to once again sell the briefs in the US at a few places. Maybe not Macys but Swimoutlet is marketing the black Adidas brief with the three white slashes on the sides. Here is the link.

https://www.swimoutlet.com/p/adidas-...ayt&color=9325

The only photo I have is sans a male swim brief model, so it is difficult to determine if this is the exact same brief that I own. The sides look a little wider, Mine in the smaller waist sizes are closer to two-inch than 3-inch. But that may be an illusion.

So, last night I slipped on a 30” Adidas, and put my penis in the classic Christopher Atkins position with the underside pressing firmly against the front of the brief. That always feels really really good. Just for fun I pulled my slick old school Puma shorts over, and things started feeling even better. I quickly fell asleep thinking about all of this.

I woke up early this morning and checked. My penis was still in the same place where it was when I crawled in bed, exactly the place Christopher Atkins thought it should be. This is a truly happy place, for sure. My penis had clearly been in a very happy place all night long, pumping out a few drops of precum on the brief liner every now and then.. Do guys all know where this place is and why this particular brief quickly gets a guy there? I have long been enamored with the sensitivity of the underside of my penis when it presses against the slick-and-snug cloth of the right swim brief. And this is surely where it is at on a bunch of different levels, a great place to explore your innermost feelings and sensations. It is possible to do that all night long, asleep, half-asleep and awake. Tugging and pressing while half asleep is always great fun. I start thinking I am back to being only 13 again, half-asleep and exploring my own body under the cover of darkness!

Maybe just maybe in writing this story I can help you find this place as well. The correct swim brief has lots of recreational uses other than for swimming. I think you will like these places too once you find them. I continue to be amazed and overwhelmed by how this all works and how enjoyable it is, and a big shout out to Adidas for pressing all the right buttons for me. Given what I experience wearing them, these briefs should be in high demand.

To be continued…

[sebbie]

Part CI (101)

The role that snug-fitting clothing plays in a guy’s life has always been a topic that has fascinated me. Once I got to an age where I COULD ejaculate, then the question quickly turned to exactly what the circumstances were when this actually happened, involuntarily or with some “overt” help from me.

Think back to the first time in your life that you actually realized that you had ejaculated semen. Some medical references claim that some guys have dry orgasms with repetitive involuntary muscle contractions for some months to actually ‘voiding” any semen. (I am always amused by the sober phrase “voiding semen” as if this were somehow a somber, completely joyless event.)

Anyhow, I don’t recall ever having a dry orgasm. The earliest recollection I recall of voiding semen has me awakening at 2 AM and discovering there was a goofy puddle of something sticky on my pajama leg that if I were lucky, turned into a still noticeable and starchy looking dry stain by morning. Mom said “That is nothing to worry about” but did not tell me anything else (or tell me to see if I could somehow stop doing that. (The limited advice I was getting was somehow both reassuring and in retrospect, amusing).

The first few times this happened the stains were small and almost unnoticeable, but a problem was that they were starting to get bigger. And despite the fact that these events were occurring in the middle of the night, it dawned on me that maybe just maybe I should not be just sleeping right through them. Instead, why not wake up just before this happens and then fall back asleep afterwards?

The other major event in a boy’s life is when he has his first daytime orgasm and voiding of semen. My personal recollection was that I was fond of swimsuits at a very early age especially the ones with the snug nylon liners. And I had a little wading pool in the yard. Oh hot days I would get into my suit, crawl into the pool and just sit in the water for many minutes if not hours. What to do? Why sit and stare at my navel? My penis was drawing my attention away from that as it was starting to feel really good as I sat there and the more I thought about it the better it felt.

Suddenly and somewhat violently (at least I thought so at the time) my penis started to feel really, really good. I was suddenly in a very special place. I was ejaculating into the swimsuit. But conveniently the water in the little pool was going to wash away any evidence. Should I tell mom what had happened to me? Well no, I thought, as she seemed totally unconcerned with the same thing happened to me in bed at night. But, I had just had my first daytime orgasm, and boy was it fun. Plus it was a complete secret. No one knew other than me.

So, I quickly figured out the real reason to try and be in the wading pool on a regular basis, and this became a regular summertime routine. The swimwear soon got connected psychologically to being able to have a secret orgasm. Besides, I was perfecting my bedtime techniques. I was beginning to realize that there was no longer any reason to just wait and see if a nocturnal emission just happened (perhaps at a strange hour like too near the time I needed to wake up for the semen to have time to dry).

Instead, I could kind of “encourage” things along a bit on my own. And the stuff I had pieced together while out in the wading pool was, well, helpful. Why not ejaculate, fully awake, at 11 pm, for example, and the semen stains would have plenty of time to fully dry by early morning? I was making important calculations like this and begging a schedule that had me ejaculating nearly every night.

More generally my fondness for snug=fitting clothing was increasing. I wanted to be in anything that I thought would get me aroused. And I was watching my friends. At that age guys are growing rapidly, and starting to build more muscular bodies, meaning they were quickly outgrowing jeans that were correctly sized in the previous summer. Most parents (mainly the moms) were struggling to keep the boys in close that fit their bigger bodies.

But I noticed an odd thing. At least some of the guys who had clearly outgrown the jeans they wore the past summer were still wearing them this year anyway. Perhaps their parents were too poor to buy them jeans that fit. No, the guys seemed to actually like the fact that the jeans a bit fit tight in the thigh, short in the ankle, and, seemingly most importantly, snug in the butt. The fact that the jeans were now worn but now body-conforming seemed now to be a plus, not a minus. What was going on here?

I grew up in a Western-focused community, and a modified cowboy look was very popular. Wrangler cowboy-cut jeans complete with the Wrangler patch on the right rear pocket was a very popular look, and part of the look is the fact that the jeans fit close to the body but especially so in the butt and thighs.

Stretch denim had yet to be invented, and jeans routinely shrunk when washed a few times. This meant that jeans that were merely snug when purchased after a few washings were, well, quite body-conforming.

I remember being in the local store in search for a pair of Wrangler jeans. Another guy was also shopping and trying jeans on. He complained to the clerk that a particular pair of jeans was OK but he was actually in search of a pair that fit snugger in the thigh and in the butt. I suspect the clerk was concerned that any snugger cut or smaller size would be too tight to wear after a few washings, but that did not seem to concern the guy at all. The whole idea was that when the jeans were laundered, they would have to conform to the guy’s body exactly even if this required some effort to get into the jean. The tighter the fit, the better, and a bit of a struggle getting in and out of the jeans was part of that.

At that point in time I got to thinking about the predicament the guy would find himself in if he got a hard-on wearing those. But maybe, just maybe that was what he was hoping for. These are the kinds of questions one never gets answered.

As time wore on, stuff kept getting snugger and tighter for me as well. In the back of my mind I was worried the potential about the embarrassment of having an “involuntary voiding” of semen even as I was enamored with being able to keep maintaining a nice semi hard-on as the day went on.

To be continued…

[sebbie]

Just Having Fun!

A guy’s early experiences with his post-puberty body may at first seem all but inconsequential, but leave an indelible imprint on what a guy continues to enjoy doing throughout his life. I have always found this statement to be both weird and interesting. At one time I thought that perhaps I was the only one “affected” in this way, but I have gradually come to the conclusion that other guys have the same “problem” or “hang up”.

Bluntly put, a guy’s first experience in ejaculating contains equal parts “scary” and “fun” At least, that is the mindset I had the first time “it” happened to me. At the same time, was scared stiff (no pun intended), but enjoying myself with wonderful sensations that I had never experienced before.

So, I want each of my readers to think back to the very first ejaculatory experience each of you have had in the daytime and were wide awake. What exactly were the circumstances that sent this “unfortunate” event off? Of course, this was not an unfortunate event at all, but an extraordinarily wonderful, happy event. Psychological and sexual nirvana. Of course, you thought the sensations were great fun in addition to being scary.

For most guys, I suspect your first wide-awake experience was not with a sexual partner or even in the presence of a possible sexual partner. Someone else may have inadvertently been there, but having this happen in the presence of a sibling, parent or male peer added complexity to the situation and you might still be psychologically affected by the fact that this happened to you in an “embarrassing” situation. Guys quickly learn that they should keep utterly silent to anyone around them about anything that happens ejaculation-wise. [This at least holds until guys learn that they can make money uploading ejaculation videos to a porn Web site, but they learn that much later! And most of these hide the face (identity) of the ejaculator. Same deal, interestingly! ]

So what set you off way back? I guess it should come as no surprise that personally my first experience of this sort occurred while I was wearing swimwear. I saw photos of guys in Sears and Wards catalogs modeling brief-style suits and wanted very much to be in the same place they were in. The suits they were wearing just HAD to feel really good. All I had was a boxer-style suit, but, oddly enough, the nylon lining was essentially a brief suit underneath. For now, that would have to do!. But at that age I was so horny and easily aroused that was plenty. The rest was history.

Then my two male cousins from the West Coast showed up and they both wore swim briefs on a more or less steady basis and had no issues doing that even if they were not near a body of water. How I admired them! But I was well into college before I got my first real swim brief. By then I was living alone and could enjoy myself whenever I wanted to. Many of my suits have taken a lot of this sort of “abuse” over the years and I have enjoyed every minute of it. Every, every second!

For a long time I kept wondering if there are other guys out there who grew up with a similar fondness for swim briefs. Do I have some weird psychological “disorder” of some sort, or is this common among guys?I also keep wondering about the gay/straight thing. If there is a fondness for swim briefs as masturbation aids, should this be thought of as somehow being a “gay indicator”? Or do many other guys who deem themselves straight have the same “swim brief” affliction? This is a puzzle I have never totally resolved.

Many of you are aware that I had my prostate removed in 2014, and one of the side effects of the surgery is the inability to get a spontaneous erection. The orgasm muscles still work, but orgasms are just OK without an erection. The good news is that for some guys the ability to get an erection sometimes gradually returns over time. The tricky part is that normally guys get erections because of some weird mixture of the physical and the mental, and no two guys are the same in this regard. I wanted to see if I could improve my situation over time by using a variety of methods, a vibrator, a little estim device, a VED device. All of these are devices for treating erectile dysfunction in all its forms irrespective of the cause but they are also used purely for recreation. But what excites a guy varies a lot from one guy to another. After surgery a lot of guys are looking to get enough of an erection to have penis/vagina sex with the wife.

So, fast forward 50 years. I am 72 years old and likely about 60 years past my first wonderful-but-scary daytime ejaculatory experience. Every night I have been running “experiments” using the various devices. Vibrator or estim first, then the VED. But I usually come out of the VED being, well, quite big and hard. I like to then see if I can take myself to yet another level without going into an orgasm. I’m “edging” as in getting close to the edge of not being able to control myself but staying just on this side. Being there is fun. Way, way fun! Really, really fun! And the next day I can pick up where I left off, pretty much, but I will keep feeling hornier and hornier as the days go by. The tricky part is to learn how to do this over multiple days.

So, what next? Why I pull out a swim brief, a little blue “Club Swim” Euro brief with a 28 inch waist that I can barely fit myself into. This fits like a Seobean or Aqux brief and doesn’t quite cover my “Y” in back. And the “comfortable” place for my still-somewhat-erect penis is “up”. Funny, I feel down there. My penis seems to like where it is at very much. I am suddenly 12 again and am feeling really good. I’m not scared any more. I’m just enjoying myself.

I sleep soundly through the night. I awake and feel myself down there. My penis is still pointed up, and feels somewhat hard. If my penis is happy my outlook on life is good. I want to keep going today. Continue to enjoy myself. I discard the brief which now has a neat little precum stain on the lining where my penis tip has lain all night long. I still feel horny as all get out.

I slip on that “mean” little 2x(ist) thong I am so fond of, and over that my asics wrestling singlet. Today will be a fine day. Meanwhile I have learned a lot from watching porn videos. The guys in the videos are using vibrators as well as a variety of estim and VED devices for recreational masturbation. And interestingly, some of them are also edging in the sense that they are employing these devices over several days and seeing exactly how long they can go without having an orgasm. Watching other guys attempt this is interesting. I’m 4 days past my last orgasm. This keeps getting tougher and tougher to do, but at the same time each day somehow gets more and more enjoyable. Weird fun!

The guys in the videos are doing this as recreational masturbation and not treating any physical issue. The idea of forcing me to sleep in a really tight-fitting swim brief is mine, however, and adds a new dimension to the entire experience. I want to do that some more! Lots more in fact!

Oh, and I have come to the conclusion that the main reason most swim briefs have a front lining is not to better hide one’s penis when the brief is wet, but to provide an additional layer of “protection” when a guy precums in the brief so that a trail of tiny wet stains do not show on the front of the brief before he dives into the water!

Enjoy!