[sebbie]

As any guy Josh or Dylan’s age knows, penises at times can be most interesting in their behaviors. Every penis somehow “knows” that it “wants to be in a place that is snug and tight-fitting, and, in particular, penises oftentimes get aroused just “thinking” about that possibility. OK, OK, penises don’t actually “think” on their own, despite the fact that some guys on occasion “behave” as if that were the case. But, for many guys, a simple thought about even the possibility of being able to be inside a confined space is enough to get a guy aroused.

Pre cum is an interesting part of all of this, in that a guy doesn’t even have to be at all erect to start the flow. Josh and Dylan are old enough now to start to realize what is going on whenever just a “flash” of a thought occurs with respect to the possibility of being able to put a penis in a space that is likely to be a little snug and tight.

This story could go in a number of different directions at this point. Any mostly heterosexual guy knows that this fascination with getting one’s penis into a snug-and-tight female vagina drives male-female relationships forward and all of the so-called biological drive for having sex with a woman. Or, the story could go down a parallel track involving two gay males who are engaged in only a slight variation on the same basic idea of having partner sex.

But the situation now faced by Josh and Dylan does not follow either of these paths. They are not having partner sex with women, nor are they having gay sex with each other. They are out in some other space entirely, a space that cannot readily be identified as partner sex at all, gay or straight. Because of this, some of my readers might be tempted to conclude that Josh and Dylan are involved in something that is not that much fun, and perhaps a third-rate alternative to having “real” sex with a partner, straight or gay.

Of course, self-pleasuring, alone or in the presence of another (male or female) has always gotten a “bum rap” so far as sexual pleasure goes. Guys at a very early age learn that stroking oneself, even though quite fun and ultimately physically harmless, is something that should be done alone, maybe in the privacy of a bathroom, or in darkness under the bed covers. Guys are always supposed to be embarrassed if anyone else should accidentaly discover what they are doing to themselves. What will happen if my mom or dad accidentally find out what I have been up to? My brothers or sisters? Or, holy terror, the guys in my class? Wash day always presents something of a dilemma, as there may be tell-tale starchy stains on sheets, pajamas or underwear bottoms. Maybe mom won’t notice, or if she does, maybe she will act as if there is nothing “wrong”.

Somehow, Dylan and Josh have both managed to maneuver through all of this and have made it into college. Both Dylan and Josh knew that the idea of having a male roommate in a not-very-big college dorm room was going to make life, well, interesting, from a self-pleasuring perspective. Have the “rules” that applied to this in grade school and high school with respect to never revealing what you do to another male your age suddenly changed once in college? Is every college guy expected to have a social life that involves not only dating but dating that leads to partner sex with a female at least once a week if not more frequently than that? Is that considered “normal” behavior for college freshmen of both sexes? If so, that puts the dating pair in an interesting situation that could easily end up with responsibilities that most college freshmen are not really ready to take on. The weekly date with sex has complex risks of a lot of different types for college freshmen of both sexes.

But if not that, how does a guy that age deal with his “urges”. Male hormones are flowing that lead to erections at unexpected times and places. Then there is the “stuff”. Many guys, maybe most, go through grade school and high school wondering about certain clothing items that for whatever reason they never got to wear. These are typically items that provide a snug fit, but in particular fit snug around the penis. The list of items commonly are worn by athletes, and includes a bunch of the stuff that Dylan ordered from Amazon® and are now in his dorm room dresser drawer. Guys are generally curious about how their bodies would “behave” wearing any of these items, and in particular if any of these items would prove useful in self-pleasuring, but they are generally very embarrassed about even having these thoughts. These items commonly include swim briefs, athletic supporters of various sorts, with or without hard cups, compression gear including swim jammers, and thongs of various sorts whether made to be worn as swimwear or as male underwear.

A reading of the literature dealing with male sexuality and male arousal does not provide a lot of help. Interestingly, a lot of the authors are female researchers who have difficulty understanding or relating at all to what goes on inside males minds and bodies, and in particular have difficulty relating to the snug-fitting clothing thing or the possibility that guys might “enjoy” pleasuring themselves. Basically, the thinking is consistent with the view that masturbation is hardly a form of sex if at all, and certainly inferior in all respects to real, partner sex.

But a more careful reading of what is often anonymous survey literature reveals some very different conclusions. In particular, that many males, when surveyed anonymously, admit to having stronger orgasms during masturbation than in partner sex. This finding comes as quite a shock to women who are “programmed” to believe that they are the sole source of sexual pleasure for men. What about the husband who regularly masturbates and attempts to hide that fact from his wife in much the same manner as he attempted to hide this from his mom when he was only 12-years old.

And what of the clothing items on the list? The writers on the subject tend to label anything that involves sexual pleasure that is an inanimate object as something of a fetish, and fetishes of any sort, are by definition “abnormal.” So if any guy admits to this, he has a sexual hang-up that perhaps needs “attention” for repair by a “trained psychologist.” This idea reminds me a lot of the idea that any guy who is sexually attracted to another guy has an issue that needs to be repaired by a trained psychologist. We have gotten over that one, pretty much, but the idea that normal guys can and do get aroused by wearing certain clothing items is not that far along. The issue here of course is that the partner should be the sole source of sexual pleasure for a guy, straight or gay, and that anything that falls outside of that norm is somehow “abnormal”.

Tell that to Josh and Dylan. What they are doing in the privacy of their dorm room is somehow, abnormal and psychologically “wrong.”Tell Josh and Dylan that instead of enjoying themselves in this manner that they should be very embarrassed about doing these things, however pleasurable they might individually find them to be. Tell Josh and Dylan that they have no right to enjoy themselves this way, and that they both need to get a better social life.

NOT!!! Josh is enjoying himself immensely inside the thong. He is realizing not that the thong helps him to take self-pleasuring to an entirely new level. Dylan is having fun too, just watching Josh struggle with all the sensations that Dylan knew would be there for Josh to try to deal with. Can something that is so much fun possibly be considered abnormal or wrong? Has anyone been harmed in all of this? What if Josh enjoys all of this too much and as a consequence never develops a partner-focused social life?

To be continued…