[sebbie]

Just growing up

Today, I want to share with you some thoughts I have been having about my years when I was growing up, but in particular in the years just past puberty. I grew up on a farm, in a rural area, in the middle of nowhere with the nearest neighbor being a half mile away. My first 5 years of schooling was in a one-room rural school that only had 6 students the last two years I attended. So I did not have a lot of close friends male or female.

I also have only one sibling, a brother 5 years older than I. By age 14, when I was a freshman in high school, my brother was 19 and off to college most of the year and not living at home. So I got to take over the bedroom we had shared before, and this meant that as a young teenager I had a degree of privacy that, as you will see, came in very handy at times given the “experiments” I liked to run.

I have been fascinated with male sexuality and what happens down there. I had a little set of encyclopedias, and mostly I spent my time as a young teenager poring over the articles that used the term “sexual arousal.” What I learned became a basis for running an “experiment” of one sort or another. Usually the experiment involved getting myself way horny and then ejaculating, although these experiments were best run in night under the covers. But then I was in my room alone so there were lots of opportunities to experiment.

My parents were great in almost all respects. They not only asked no questions, on the few occasions when I was really young I mentioned to my mom that I was having “this problem” (ejaculating) during the night. This seemed to concern my mom not at all. She said to me “that is fine, and what is happening to you is fine too.” I can’t imagine a better situation for a 14-year old. I could continue to act as if these events were happening involuntarily, in my sleep as a “wet dream” even though I may have been wide awake and providing some manual “encouragement”. Mom seemed to think that whatever was happening and the reason did not matter, and that I was just a normal boy.

I have had a fondness for briefs since before puberty. Back then the common swimwear was not a brief, but a short legged cotton suit. And almost invariably these suits featured a brief-style inner liner, there so a guy’s vital parts did not fall out while swimming given that the trunk was but a loose fit. I quickly figured out that of I was not going to get the paors of tighty whiteys I longed for, this suit with a brief style liner was a good substitute. I pulled on the shorts and sure enough, instant and very obvious erection and hard on. I looked at my situation and being a young boy I said to my mom “I seem to have a problem here.” My mom said “What is that? I pulled back the waist of the suit and showed her. My penis was as big as I had ever seen it and a ruddy color that looked unnatural to me too, but worse, it was hard and pointes straight forward the bulge easily seen. Interestingly, my mom said to me “the situation you are in must be thrilling you to the core! But the only way you are going to recover is to quit thinking about your penis so much! But that was easier said than done for sure. The question was “How do I NOT think about an erect and hard penis, a penis that thrills me to the core? But I was only 12 or so. What could I expect? No doubt my mom thought the whole sequence was more than a little silly, though she obviously understood my predicament she seemed not to feel very sorry for me.

In those days guys all wore pajamas to bed, tops with sleeves and matching long-legged bottoms—and sleeping in boxer shorts was not popular at all. The tricky part was ejaculating when it was nearly dawn, because invariably I would have splotches of cum trailing down one of my pajama legs and I could hardly show up for breakfast looking that way. This was a real problem. I soon discovered that if I ejaculated earlier at night, say before midnight, the cum would dry leaving only a yellowish starchy stain on the pajama leg. Once dried, that was not nearly so noticeable. So I learned to run my experiments before midnight, and what fun they were! I was learning a lot about myself and what was fun to do, day by day.

It was not long before I figured out that the underside of my penis was a lot more touch-sensitive than the top side, and the underside really loved to be touched and fondled in various ways. I liked to do that and soon I would have a really nice hard-on. Then what to do. Why not flop over on my stomach, penis pointed upward and put my body weight on the top of my penis while moving myself back and forth in repetitive strokes tpo further stimulate the underside. Ejaculation was only moments away. Only later did I learn that this masturbation method was quite aggressive and if I threw enough body weight onto a fully erect penis from above in this way I might even damage something. But I was this skinny little guy about 100 pounds or so, and nothing bad ever happened.

The other down side was that I quickly discovered that my body produced a huge amount of semen employing this technique. For starters I was way turned on and the semen just cam pouring out. Worse it all accumulated in one large and really wet spot on the lower sheet, a spot that might take some considerable effort to remove in the wash. Still, mom never complained. I guess this is what a mom has to put up with in raising a 14-year old boy. (in later years, I had assigned a female primary care physician and she wondered if that was a concern for me. She said, “Don’t worry, I have raised 6 boys, and I have seen everything there is to see!”).

Mom was remarkable in these years. The only complaint I had is that mom thought guys should wear boxer briefs not tighty whiteys, and bought my underwear through mail order Sears or Wards, as the design was tough to find then in the stores. The guys I knew all wore tighty whitey briefs, and I admired them. I thought tighty whiteys would be much more fun to masturbate in, as so much wanted some, but mom insisted.

The thing I find most interesting about this is that nowadays the teenage guys almost all wear boxer briefs similar to the style my mom favored except now maybe not white but somber grays and navy blue. Tighty whiteys are as rare among teens as boxer briefs were in my years growing up. But if you wonder where the roots of my fondness for jerking off in a pair of maybe undersized tighty whiteys, it may be related to my longings for not being able to do the same thing as a young teenager, and this was the one “scar” mom left on me with regard to sex. Still, once I got to the age where I could comfortably go out and buy my own underwear I quickly made up for lost time, I went out and bought some tighty whiteys, kept the boxer briefs in my drawer lest I need convince my mom that I still wore them, but soon I was wearing tighty whiteys exclusively and enjoying the fit and feel which turned to be at least as good as I had long fantasized about. All of y this soon led to buying swim briefs even though I was not a swimmer, another male jerk-off fantasy thing for sure. It was more difficult to concoct a plausible story line but eventually I was out on my own, living alone and no longer needed a story line.

Overall, I had great fun as a teenager in high school. I can tell you a few stories in which for no really good reason and at an inopportune time or place I ejaculated in a situation that was embarrassing though I suspect many if not most males have some similar teen experiences to tell about. One time, I was just riding along in the school bus over a bumpy road, and sure enough the vibrations felt good in a scary way. The ejaculate oddly enough collected on the BACK side of my pant leg, and so long as I remained seated the wet spot could not be seen at all. When it came time for me to get off the bus, I made a quick exit and no one was the wiser.

Another time I was wearing a new pair of what I thought was a great pair of skinnier-than-I-was-used-to jeans, and this time I got a hard-on pointed downward, and I was in a bad way. With each step I was taking, along side a male friend who was walking along side me, as I moved I kept getting harder and harder. Something soon had to give, I had to stop for a minute and I quickly started to ejaculate, and the semen quickly left a stain on the front of my newly-acquired skinny jeans. I suspect the friend I was walking with figured something was going on and he may have noticed the damp cum stains on the leg of my jeans, but he never said a thing. Somehow I survived all of this. Did I mention that I have this “thing” for snug-fitting jeans as well? Nothing better than a pair of undersized tighty whiteys covered by jeans that conform to the shape of my body, or so it was!

In retrospect, mom was pretty open minded about “guy things”. Maybe I should have just asked her to order me one package of boxer briefs and a smaller 3-pack of white cotton briefs that I would wear in warm weather, and see if she would agree to that. But then I would have faced the problem of trying to figure out how I could get 3 pair of briefs that had starchy yellowish cum stains on the pouch from my wintertime activities washed and dried so that they would be ready for summer wear! I was just too scared.