Part CIV
Male sexual arousal is always this complicated mixture of the psychological along with the physical sensations. Starting at puberty, and maybe before, guys’ psyches are bombarded with the idea that while male sexuality is a lot of fun, the key to being able to enjoy your own body as a male human being is all about building a relationship with a sexual partner—most often female but perhaps another male.
Every guy who has made it through puberty knows that he can easily get aroused and get goofy fun feelings without being in the presence of a sexual partner—but frequently the stimuli still involve activities between two people, say on an Internet video—which the guy is often scared to watch but he does it anyway, in part writing it off as a “learning experience” so he will know exactly what he should do at the point in his life when he does get involved with a real sexual partner.
In another place entirely is the idea that a guy can get sexually aroused to the point of ejaculating without even thinking about being with a sexual partner. Every guy by the time he turns 14 already has had any number of experiences that prove this, but this is one of the darkest secrets of male sexuality as in “I know I jerk off whenever I get in a private enough of a situation that I am relaxed enough so that I won’t be discovered but I would never tell anyone what I have been doing least of all any of my male friends my age”. Guys may even attempt to somehow research the question of what their male peers do and how they handle this part of who they are, but the data are often limited.
Then there is the issue of what exactly is helpful in stimulating arousal in a guy who wants to jerk off on a regular basis. I presume that my readers here have all experienced jerking off while wearing a swim brief. This is the part that gets really interesting. How is it anyway, that the mere act of actually being able to crawl into a swim brief—something that that seems not all linked to a relationship or partner sex—can get a guy so aroused? That is really strange and goofy, or is it? Does the fact that I get turned on this way mean that I am gay and would prefer another guy to a female as a sexual partner? What gives, anyway? If put in the same situation would my peer males have the same “response” to wearing a swim brief? Is this common among guys, or am I the only guy in existence that somehow thinks jerking off in a swim brief might be way fun? What exactly is it about the swim brief that sets me off, arousal wise? It seems crazy, but I also like being in this situation a lot except that I sure hope no one else ever finds out that I have this weird “affliction”?
A fun mind-game is to think back at the first time you actually got your own swim brief. What are the details of your personal experience? Were you a swimmer and this was a requirement for all the team members? Did you ask your parents to buy you one because you “needed” it for school? Did you get to go shopping for your brief on your own? And how did you feel physically and psychologically when all of this was going on? Were you aroused simply by thinking about what was happening? Did you have male peers you knew were “stuck” in the same situation and if so how were they coping?
Now, guys generally don’t get a hard-on every time something touches the penis, and that is fortunate. But by the time a guy turns 14 he already knows that merely wearing clothing covering the groin will not likely get him an instant erection, and guys are thankful for that. Still, by age 14 guys know that their penises are quite sensitive to certain kinds of rubbing or touching. Heck, a successful jerk-off session is all about rubbing all the right places in just the right way. But one could make the case that the same holds true for successful partner sex. There are nerve endings down there, and they are nerves that love being stimulated that way. This is at the heart of who we are as males for goodness sakes.
I’ve thought long and hard about what makes a swim brief so special with regard to sending fun signals to arousal central. I think it’s a combination of things. Penises love being in snug places, but especially snug spaces with slick and smooth walls. And the fabric of a swim brief not only fits snuggly, but is way slick and smooth. Maybe not as snug, slick and smooth as the walls of a vagina, but still a fascinating place to have one’s anatomy inside.
All I know is that I wanted to have a swim brief from the very first time I saw a guy wearing one, but a particular turn-on for me was seeing a guy’s penis outline pointed upward with the underside of his penis pressed firmly against the slick, stretchy pouch cloth. That guy must really be enjoying his situation and I really want to be in the same situation he is in.
Does my fascination with this mean I have a gay side? Would any gay guy be turned on just by seeing a guy wearing a swim brief pointed up like this? Well, swim briefs do seem to play more of a role in the gay world than in the straight world, but I can only guess.
Getting back to the main story here, another question is what was your first experience that happened after you crawled into the swim brief that you got for the very first time. I would have been horny as all get out in that regard and wanting to “try it on” to experience the sensations as soon as I thought I could get some privacy. What I would have really had in mind was to break-in the brief by jerking off in it to ejaculation. Then I would have had to rinse off the ejaculate and allow it to dry. But I would have been thinking that maybe if I got this over with for one time I would be starting to get “used” to the idea of wearing it, and the second time would not be as traumatic (or fun) and so on, so that I could eventually wear the brief without any fear at all of uncontrollably going into an orgasm. Or maybe not. My big question would have been whether the other guys my age were also having to deal with something very similar to what I was going through. Had they known what happened to me, some of my peers may have tried to claim that my ejaculating in the swim brief was clear evidence that I was gay, and that is not something most guys would want to have happen. Dark secrets here.
Jerking off in a swim brief is not something that a guy suddenly loses interest in doing as he enters young adulthood. More generally sex therapists like to say that guys gradually quit jerking off alone so much as they build bonds with sexual partners. If so, this means that jerking off in a swim brief is not something most married guys would ever do because partner sex is both better and more enjoyable. What does a guy do if he still is fond of jerking off in a swim brief after he has established bonds with whoever wants to be a sexual partner? If that partner finds out about the guy’s “affliction” how will the partner cope? The whole subject of solo male sex poses some knotty issues for guys but I presume more so for straight guys with female partners than for gay guys, given that most women are taught that she should be the sole source of sexual pleasure for a guy, and a guy jerking off in a swim brief simply does not compute in that world. For two gay guys, the idea of mutually enjoying a swim brief jerk-off session seems tame as both guys are on the same page sexually.
Still, the question I always have is that there seems to be a lot more sales of swim briefs on line than I see swimmers wearing briefs at the pool or beach. Might it be that many guys buy these simply because they enjoy jerking off in them? Maybe I am not alone in this respect.
To be continued…